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Libs say the darndest things
Made popular 339 days ago in
In my never-ending effort to understand the liberal mind, I'm beginning to scribble down nutty sayings from the liberals I happen to run into. I call it Libs say the darnedest things.
This idea started for me a couple of weeks ago, when a lefty cat-lady (a big demographic) told me with a hypnotic stare, "There are no facts."
Wow. Floored in one. I was left gaga. Couldn't figure out what to say that would get through her concrete space helmet.
So I staggered off and had a drink.
This one has gone viral in the lefto-psychosphere. You get 2,560,000 google hits for "There are no facts."
Such little mindworms tell us about our age of ignorance and superstition.
Obama has contributed his own pearls to the genre, like "The private economy is doing fine" when unemployment is at 8.2%, about 7% of American workers are underemployed, and another big chunk are on permanent disability, making for about 20% of the work force not working.
The Bamster is an endless fountain of oddball quotes, and half the country doesn't notice anything wrong. At least Jimmy Carter got bitten by a killer rabbit.
Heard about Obama's Relativity Theory of the U.S. Constitution? It's really true.
A couple of years ago, the Washington Post boasted about Obama's brilliance as a student at Harvard Law. Just to prove the point, a WaPo reporter cited Professor Larry Tribe's thank-you footnote for Obama, in an article claiming that Einstein's Relativity Theory applies to the U.S. Constitution. It appears that constitutional time and space can be twisted around heavy objects, like the heavy-duty intellects of Barry and Larry, twin stars of the legal cosmos.
Obama is pretty awful, but Joe Biden...well, that's shooting ducks in a pond.
Here are a few I've picked up. Please add your own in the comments below.
1. A couple college-educated libs talking about insecticides that are safe to use around pets: "It's organic. It's safe."
The organic poisons that will kill you include arsenic, apple seeds, cherry leaves, unsoaked kidney beans, cassava roots, and uncooked potato skins. But they're organic! They can't hurt you!
This is sheer, unvarnished superstition, straight from the Dark Ages. Every other liberal believes it.
Or how about...
2. "My kids will have free health care for life."
Told to me by a rich but really eccentric lib, with two unemployed children in their 30s living in San Francisco.
Guess why they can't find jobs. Right.
3. "Marijuana is a medicine."
Read more: http://www.americanthinker.com/2012/07/libs_say_the_darndest_things.html#ixzz20gZzNXzV
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Are liberals like normal people?
Maybe, some of them fool you by looking normal, but then they open their mouths.
This is not a scientific survey,
to learn more. Results may not total 100% due to rounding and voting descrepencies.
339 days ago
Who gave the Democrats a national convention? Well, before their crazy ideas can spread too far, I sent my crack research team to find all they can about the dreaded Crat?s of Dem.
FUN FACTS ABOUT DEMOCRATS
* Democrats chose the donkey as their symbol because the Democrat base smells as bad as one and has the same verbal skills. In the donkey's defense, it's smart enough to understand a butterfly ballot.
* Democrats are big into class warfare. They also are for gun control which has caused the deadliest firearms to be too expensive except for the rich to buy. So, if class warfare ever goes to blows, it won't last long.
* Though there are more registered Democrats, they don't vote as much as Republicans percentage-wise because of their tendency to be distracted by shiny things.
* Democrats have lost most of the men's vote because they're a bunch of girlie men. Don't tell them that, though, because they'll cry.
* Democrats are always trying to get into your wallet to spend money on their wacky ideas. If you see a Democrat near your wallet, hit him on the head with a rolled up newspaper. You have to catch him in the act or he'll never learn.
* While the Democratic leadership is currently devoid of any real leadership or substance, they may try and make up for that with important-looking hair.
* Some Democrats may have served in Vietnam. You can find out which ones by seeing who tells you that fact over and over and over.
* And over and over and over.
* Many Democrats intensely hate Bush because it's easier than confronting the irrelevancy of their ideas. It?s funny to dump a bucket of cold water on them and hear them blame Haliburton.
* If you're plagued by Democrats, they can be scared away with snakes, guns, or concepts of individual responsibility.
* Bill Clinton, who cost the Democrats their majorities in the House, Senate, and Governorships while he was president, is still venerated by Democrats because... uh... I guess they're just frick'n retards.
* Democrats will often visit maternity wards and shake their fists angrily at all those who escaped the wrath of choice.
* Democrats are secretly trying to destroy capitalism. If you see a Democrat near capitalism and looking suspicious, immediately report him to the police.
* In a fight between Democrats and Aquaman, Aquaman would be slurred by an NAACP ad that links him to lynching.
* The Democrats have built a giant statue in tribute to Michael Moore which eyes glow red, shoots fire out of its ass, and constantly demands tributes of ham.
* Or maybe that is just Michael Moore wearing a gray sweat suit. Whatever it is, don't let it fall on you because it's heavy.
* The foreign policy ideals of the Democrats involved waiting for the might France to approve anything they plan on doing. This should allow them to snap into action about the time half the earth is destroyed by radical Islamists.
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